glitter and gravel

Have you ever wondered why someone would choose to be friends with/date/marry someone like you? What sets you apart from other people in the world? Something I have been hearing a lot lately (even in my own mind) is that (most) people are the same.

What I wonder, specifically, relates to why someone would choose me over some other girl (in the world of dating, business, friendship, or anything else). What makes me unique, special, or sought after?

The truth is that I’m not sure. Actually, quite honestly, I have no idea. I can only wonder and hope that something does make me different, that something sets me apart. I think for Christians, the most obvious answer to this is that (hopefully) you will be able to tell a difference in character, morals, and the whole persona. It does go beyond that, however. There are many Christian ladies who are much more beautiful, or servant-like, or who have less baggage than I do.

For this article I have chosen to ponder over those things which make me different or unique, whether they be good or bad (and they’re mostly somewhere in between/bad).

- First of all, I am (like I have mentioned before) very awkward. This is not something that most people look for typically. Job Qualifications: Proficient in Microsoft Excel, Good with people, Friendly, Slightly socially awkward.

- I am very self-conscious/shy. At least I am aware of it though, right? This results in me seeming very “snobbish” to people who don’t know me. Sometimes I walk past someone smiling at me and completely look away, even though I’m totally not being rude intentionally.

- I like to cook. This, I have realized, is a fairly large bonus. Some girls hate cooking; some girls couldn’t cook if their life depended on it. I can and do so fairly well. Plus, I like creating recipes. 2 points. But they’re not always a success… Minus 1 point.

- I’m health-minded. I realize this could be a few points for me or against me. If someone loves their sodas, cakes, cookies, and donuts, they’re not going to want to constantly have to hear about the healthy choices I have made for lunch day after day.

- I’m a Christian. This should be at the top of the list. This is usually either a very important quality in any relationship. Either you really, really want to date/hire/marry a Christian, or that’s not important to you at all.

- I’m clean. I shower daily which, in my opinion, is a great thing. Sometimes I even shower, like, twice a day. Or more. I am pretty clean. I also brush my teeth regularly.

- I don’t smoke. I’m convinced that if you smoke, you can only date other smokers. If you know of a relationship in which it isn’t this way, let me know. Related, I don’t chew tobacco or drink, either.

- I’m not the most beautiful person in the world. Not even close. I realize that. Thankfully, that isn’t the most important thing in the world. If it IS that important to you, then I shall pass.

- I don’t like to shave every day. Actually, I don’t like to shave at all. Now, don’t get confused, I DO shave; I just don’t enjoy it. And I frequently put it off for as long as possible when I am able to do so.

- I like fashion. This may or may not be important. I have known people who really just don’t go for girls/guys who are trendy or care about what they wear. I do. And although I may go out in public from time to time wearing my sweats, I prefer to actually get dressed up and look somewhat presentable.

- I wear contacts and glasses. This doesn’t seem like something I should be including in here, but I will. And the main reason is because of something I was thinking about yesterday. I remember when I was a child I was sometimes picked on because I wore glasses. Oddly enough, it was from adults. Some rude old man even went so far as to call me, at the time a 10 year old girl, “four-eyes.” I’m pretty sure my heart was somewhat broken.

- I like grammar. I don’t claim to be the best at grammar. Actually, I don’t claim to be the best at anything. But it’s really important for me to have a normal, intelligent, adult conversation with those around me. I don’t like to feel like I’m speaking AT someone.

- I eat a lot. I feel like this is a bonus for me in the “guy world,” because most guys like girls who eat. The problem comes in, however, when my metabolism slows down and I got myself a little bootydo.

- I have a funky toenail. This could very well be a deal breaker. I mean, what if someone has all the same characteristics as me, both good and bad, and I AM ABOUT TO GET CHOSEN, when all of a sudden, BAM! They see my funky baby toenail and I’m out of the race—just like that.

- I can type pretty fast. This is turning into a really, really sad “quality” list and I should stop while I am ahead (even though I’m not ahead at all).

The point is this: absolutely NO TWO PEOPLE are alike. We are all different, whether it’s just a little bit different or on totally opposite ends of life. YOU have something to offer someone/something else than I do. Maybe you have a sixth toe, a third nipple, a beautiful singing voice, great social abilities, or a love for video games. Maybe you have a perfect driving record, a love for animals, a lazy eye, or an afro.

I just hope that someone somewhere is looking for a girl with a few extremely awkward and somewhat burdensome characteristics.

Thank you to my friend, Alexis, for the inspiration for this article.

I know I am not the only one who does incredibly awkward and embarrassing things on a daily basis. At least, I like to think  I’m not. The things that I do, however, are not necessarily life-ruining, but I have (quite literally) smacked myself in the face after doing them. It’s probably awkward that I do that. It’s probably awkward that I just admitted it.

I will now confess some things that I do (or have done) which still make me shake my head and go “Jessica! Jessica, no!”

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